Hard to Get

you who live in heaven
hear the prayers of those of us who live on earth
who are afraid of being left by those we love
and who get hardened by the hurt
do you remember when you lived down here
where we all scrape to find the faith to ask for daily bread
did you forget about us after you had flown away
well I have memorized every word you said
still I'm so scared I'm holding my breath
while you're up there just playing hard to get

you who live in radiance
hear the prayers of those of us who live in skin
we have a love that's not as patient as yours was
still we do love now and then
did you ever know loneliness
did you ever know need
do you remember just how long a night can get
when you are barely holding on and your friends fall asleep
and don't see the blood that's running in your sweat
will those who mourn be left uncomforted
while you're up there just playing hard to get

and I know you bore our sorrows
and I know you feel our pain
and I know that it would not hurt any less
even if it could be explained
and I know that I am only lashing out
at the one who loves me most
and after I have figured this
somehow what I really need to know is

if you who live in eternity
hear the prayers of those of us who live in time
who can't see what's ahead
and we cannot get free from what we've left behind
I'm reeling from these voices that keep screaming in my ears
all these words of shame and doubt, blame and regret
I can't see how your leading me, unless you've led me here
to where I am lost enough to let myself be led
and so, you've been here all along I guess
it's just your ways and you are just plain hard to get

Rich Mullins, The Jesus Demos, 1998.